Very sad.

I just read the saddest blog entry in the world. A friend of a friend's 8 week old baby got Pertussis. Right before he got his Pertussis vaccination at his 8 week appointment. After a few days of being very sick and in PICU he ended up dying today. I can't imagine watching your baby be sick and knowing that you have to say goodbye. I could never do that, not ever.

It makes me want to grab my baby girl and squeeze her and never let her go. It makes me glad that my house is messy, that my sink is always full of dirty dishes, that I rarely take time to cook an actual dinner for my husband, that I am awake most the night because I share the bed with a one year old whose feet go every which way. I realize that if my house was clean, my dishes were done, I spent hours making dinner, and I got a good night's sleep, it would be that much less time I spent with Paiton. She is all that matters, she is perfection. I can literally and honestly say that I generally spend 24 hours a day with her. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

So here's to extra long hugs, letting her eat Goldfish crackers for dinner, sharing my ice cream with her, and stealing kisses from her snot and sweet potato covered face. I wouldn't have it any other way.